The Alpha Blonde


This article was written on 14 Feb 2013, and is filled under Uncategorized.

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To my daughter on her fourth birthday

To my sweetheart,

You’re four today. Four is quite an age- you’re discovering what it means to be you. Your mind is doing amazing things, the world is starting to come together as you learn what things do, why they do them and how they happen.  Your questions are unabashed and straightforward.  There’s no filter telling you not to ask something because it might be uncomfortable.  You’re at an age where you call ’em as you see ’em. What a wonderful thing!

You are so flexible- it’s been two years since your father and I split up.  In that time you’ve welcomed a new Mama into your heart, a baby sister and you’ve melted the heart of your someday-step-dad. The openness and love you give is a blessing and the way you adapt to change, uncertainty and the everyday chaos of life is with such zest and- dare I say grace- is an inspiration.  I know it hasn’t been easy and I’m sorry that you learned so soon how unpredictable life can be.  I believe that the way you carry yourself now is a strong indicator of how you’re going to manage things later, and I am proud that you’re a confident, bright and loving girl. We call you the hammer because you don’t give up until you’re satisfied with the end result, that’s going to get you far later in life, use it well but use it with kindness.

I hope as you age you never stop to wonder which set of parents loves you best, but in case you do the answer is “Yes.”  We all work tirelessly behind your back in a series of text messages and phone calls with one another to make sure your upbringing is solid, you’ve received the support and encouragement you need and that questions like that don’t even ever have to apply for you or your brother. We will never expect you to choose sides, all we ask of you is to stay open with all of us.  Keep us in the loop, know you have four parents who are always ready to hear your thoughts and know that it’s okay to go to different parents for different things.  We’ll never hold it against you for choosing to talk to one of us over another for the various quandaries that will arise as you grow up and become a woman.  Use us all, we have a wealth of experience and we’d love to guide you on your path.

My dear, sweet Mollie, you’re a shining star and we’re all so lucky to have you in the world.  Thank you for letting us enjoy your silly songs and blowing us away with your observations about the world around you.  It is yours for the taking.

Happy birthday.

Love, Mom


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